Framework

2 09 2012

Series Overview

Shouting matches, stomping out of a room, insults under the breath, and even a few curse words will become more and more commonplace in the homes of our students over the next few years. What happened to the sweet children that used to hug their mom and dad as soon as they walked in the door?  Meanwhile, students are also wondering why things have changed: “Why are my parents so annoying all of a sudden? Why do they ask so many questions? Why don’t they trust me?” The truth is that part of a student growing up requires this challenging time in the relationship with their parents. It seems like the easy child/parent relationship that we all took for granted is gone. However, it can be good, again. We can get closer to that “picture perfect” ideal we all have for our home life. It simply requires both sides understanding it takes a little work.  So, for the next 2 weeks, we’ll be talking about our student/parent relationship in a series called “Framework.”

Week 1 (September 2, 2012)

Every student wants independence. It is part of growing up, but it can also be a struggle. As a parent you have a front row seat in watching this happen.  Our students want to be treated like adults, and they want independence.  Believe it or not, we want to help our students gain more independence, and I bet you will agree with us.  We want our students to know that to get more freedom and independence they only have to do one thing, honor their father and mother.  This may not be a new idea, but it is a huge idea that we want every student to grasp.  Honoring your father and mother is a key part of the Christian life, and it is one of the few commandments that comes with a promise.  At Transit, we want to partner with you the parent to not only help build the faith of your student, but also to help create a healthy family, and that begins with honoring your father and mother.

Talk to your student about your own experience with your parents. Ask your student how they would define the word honor.

Week 2 (September 9, 2012)

Every relationship is going to experience conflict at one point or another.  Whether it is between friends, siblings, or parents and children, conflict is unavoidable.  We want our students to know that conflict is a part of life, and it is something that is not easy to deal with. However, how we deal with conflict says a lot about who we are.  Students have a tendency to deal with conflict in two ways: avoidance or full on confrontation.  While you may have experiences a screaming argument or two, pretending conflict doesn’t exist can be just as bad as an all out fight.  We want our students to know that dealing with conflict is a part of life, and that in any conflict we have to be willing to own our part.  Whether we like it or not, we are never blame free. We always have some role in a conflict, and it is up to us to own it.   We need to be willing to apologize and ask for forgiveness even if 99% of the problem is because of the other person.  We are still responsible for 1% and we need to take responsibility for it.  We cannot control the response of the other person, but we can control our own response so we need to take responsibility for our own actions.

Ask your student why it is important that we learn to own our part of an argument.

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The New Rules for Love, Sex, & Dating: Gentlemen’s Club

22 04 2012

Session 2 (April 22, 2012)

Act like a man. This is a familiar phrase in our society. Maybe you have even said it to your own son. Our culture wants men who are strong, and men who show little emotion. Men who are tough and dominant. But is this what being a man is all about?  This week we want to our students, particularly the guys, to begin to understand what acting like a man really looks like.  Real men value women, and treat them with dignity, honor, and respect. Real men are servants. These ideas are not common, especially in a culture where women are treated as a commodity, as something that can be used and discarded. We want to challenge all of our male students to take the lessons of 1 Peter 3:7 to heart and “man up” by treating all women with respect.

Just as we want to challenge our guys to start acting like men, we want to encourage all of our girls that they are special and that they have real value. We want our girls to understand that they should have expectations of any guy that they have a relationship with. They need to hold guys to a high standard because they are worth it.  We want all of our girls to understand the immense value that they have in the eyes of their Creator. They are precious to God. We want this realization to permeate through all of their relationships. We want our girls to not only see the value that they have, but see the value that all women have in the eyes of God.

Talk to your student about what they think culture says about the role of women in society. Ask your son how he would want his future wife to be treated by other men right now. Ask your daughter how she would want her future husband to be treating other women right now.